Drag Me to Hell

Poster
2009
Sam Raimi

10/10

I bet a lot of you out there skipped this because you thought it was just another typical, stupid horror flick, like all the other “Saw” ripoff crap out there. Newsflash people: SAM RAIMI IS AWESOME, and he would never put out a crappy film like that, unless forced to by an asshole studio head (i.e. “Spider-man 3”)! This is the same guy who directed the “Spider-man” trilogy and the even better “Evil Dead” trilogy. Convinced yet? No? Well read on:

“Drag Me to Hell” was quite simply the best movie released last year, and perhaps in the last five (excluding Nolan’s “Batman” masterpieces of course). The fact that the “Academy” idiotically decided to expand the Best Picture field to ten this year yet still managed to exclude this instant classic is yet more evidence that the Oscars have lost all semblance of relevance. As if we needed more evidence.

If you’re talking about pure entertainment value, I defy someone to come up with a better film than this from 2009. “Avatar” would be the closest, but it was too long. “Inglourious Basterds”? BORING. This was the best moviegoing experience I have had since I saw “American Pie” in a crowded theater on the weekend of its release. For “Drag,” the theater was nearly empty but it didn’t matter; I jumped and grimaced and laughed, often all at once. You don’t even need to know what it’s about going into it. How cool is that? To just be able to trust that you are going to enjoy the shit out of whatever it is you’re about to sit down to without knowing the first thing about it? When is the last time you actually yelled during a movie? I can’t remember either, maybe never, but that’s how goddamn fun it was. It was a perfect blend of disgusting and frightening, something that only Raimi knows how to do truly well. A more-than-worthy successor to “Army of Darkness,” count me as one who is glad that Sam has returned to his horror-comedy roots.

Now you don’t come to a film like this looking for emotional impact (aside from terror), so if you are disappointed about not finding any, I recommend that you go home and quietly smell your own farts in the privacy of your closet. This movie was awesome, and I can’t explain its lack of critical acclaim except with the blanket insult of stupidity. Perhaps it was overshadowed by “Paranormal Activity,” a more gimmicky but altogether-inferior suspense film, or maybe it suffered from its early release date. Either way, my wife and I still whisper “Lamia” to each other in mock-horror when the wind blows the door shut in our house.

The bottom line is that this is exactly the movie that Sam Raimi set out to make (i.e. it was executed perfectly), and Sam Raimi made it better than anyone else in the world could have. That deserves a 10.

17 March 2010

Other Reviews for “Drag”

One Response to “Drag Me to Hell”

  1. Joseph Carr Says:

    Agreed. Loved this film. People be so lame, cat.

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